Friday, June 08, 2007

Having a cold sucks!

Wow, what a great topic after going so long without posting anything. What is up with being sick? Why is it that microscopic organisms still rule over our advanced species. A cold virus can bring a man to his knees (okay, not that bad). Stupid cold!

We may not have found a way to concur this virus, but at least we have some great drugs! MMMMmmmmmmm, sweet life enhancing drugs. Before you think I am some sort of pill popping weird-o, let me assure you that I only use drugs when I am sick or in severe (very SEVERE) pain. My stomach is a very sensitive organ. Add any sort of strong medication and really bad things happen. I avoid taking any medication, unless I absolutely have to. We all remember that great scene from the alien movies. Yep, the one where the alien baby explodes out of that poor space guy’s gut. Well, my alien larva is still growing in there, waiting for its chance to rip my belly into pieces and I would rather not speed up the process. Enough about my belly and back to the drugs. It amazes me how we can drink a few tablespoons of some nasty liquid (and I mean nasty… settle down little alien baby) or a tiny little pill and go on working. It is not a perfect pill, but I can continue to work. The phlegm, mucus, body aches, sneezing and throat issues (too graphic? We have all been there so settle down) seem to melt away. I am a work-a-holic, as you can tell by the fact I am posting this on company time, and really hate to miss work. It is true. I have not taken a sick day in almost a year. If I can make it to September, without taking any sick time, it will be a whole year. Not really sure why this is so great, and my cube mate is quick to point out I should just go home, but take it for what it is worth. Well I will wrap this up by thanking all you drug, vitamin capsule, energy booster and remedy inventing guys out there for making my end of the week a little better. I love the simple things in life and when a simple little cold cannot stop me from going to work, life is sweet. I know, I know, I must be really crazy to say I am glad I did not miss any work, but give me a break, I’M SIIIIIICCCCCKKK!!!!





- Dr. Worm

Features

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hmmm...
Took you more than 6 months to post something out here, and when you do it's the earth-shattering conclusion that having a cold sucks (yeah - I'm a bastard >:D)
What about world hunger or poverty, that stuff sucks! Iraq's former dictator using mustard gas on his neighbors - that kinda sucked. People beating baby Harbor Seals with clubs - hey, we KNOW that sucks. Rude people replying on your blog site - really sucks.

Sorry dude - take copius quantities of Vit. C and feel better.

PS. Good luck digging yourself out of that pile of Kleenexes. LOL

Anonymous said...

WARNING FROM P.I.T.A. -- This blog site contains shocking references to violent deadly force being used against our cuddly, lovable fiends, the Asiatic Harbor Seal (Genus: Thisisafraudicus, Species: Andyewateitupia).
Please discourage your youngsters from visting this particular blog site as the commentary is highly objectionable and should be accompanied by adult supervision.
Thank you.

Baren said...

See, I have stomach issues too, but I~ have this wonderful pill that makes the evil demons that threaten to wrench my gut apart go away.

Good to see you back, sorry it had to be on your day of illness.

And what exactly does P.I.T.A. stand for? People Inside Terrible Amoebas? Particularly Indifferent To Adversity?
Providing Invasive Thought Apparatuses? Help me out here.

Dr. Worm (Matt) said...

Simple typo... supposed to be P.E.T.A. Thank for taking the time to spell out the miss spelled acronym. :)